I took this one last spring.  I have always wanted to take pictures of bubbles in mid flight and so I gave it a shot.  I got a few decent ones like this one.  The thing that made me choose this picture was the clarity of my image inside, if any picture I have ever taken could truly symbolize me this is it.  I live in a bubble, a bubble I was forced to construct around myself because of things like: loss, depression, addiction, betrayal, failure, regret, abandonment, etc.  I built this bubble for myself over many years but it really became in effect when I lived in Missouri, I exiled myself there to try to find myself and it was there that I became the person I am now.  I never let anyone in and very little comes out of it, it isn’t something I am particularly proud of but it is the defense mechanism that kept me from ever harming myself.  It goes well beyond not liking when people touch me, it is far deeper than that.  I have done some terrible things and I have had some very horrible things happen to me, horrible enough to drive me into a deep depression that almost got the best of me.  I still wonder how I did make it out of that time at all, a piece of me thinks maybe I didn’t and this is some sort of afterlife, whatever the reason I am here and I am not going anywhere for quite a while.  I need this bubble in order to stay focused long enough to do what it is I was brought on this earth to do, I don’t know what that is yet but I know there is something more to my story than this.  The downside to this bubble is that the people who I truly care about will never really experience the love I have for them since my emotions need to stay inside as well.  My emotions are the reason I failed in so many things and I have found it easier to keep them inside my bubble for my own good.  I have been hurt by the ones I supposedly loved more times than I would like to remember and it was my isolation in Missouri that I realized the only way for me to really survive in this world was to never let anyone in my bubble ever again.  Since then I can say that only two, maybe three people have been allowed in and they have all seen how dark and scary it can be when I feel threatened or hurt.  The bubble isn’t just for my protection it is for the ones I love as well, I am a complicated person with a past full of regrets that continually try to drag me under and it is my bubbles ability to deflect the darkness, unfortunately sometimes I deflect it in the wrong places.  I believe in love and peace and all I ever want is a world where everyone of every race, religion, ethnicity, etc. can live side by side without hate or greed or violence yet I can’t even keep the peace in my own mind………………..PEACE!!!!!!!!!